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{ Life } Be honest, are you living in fear today? #fear #scared #anxiety

Photo: Dingzeyu Li

Photo: Dingzeyu Li

Do you live in fear?

Please be honest with yourself today as I am about to be as well and it's very confronting for me as I can imagine it is for you too.  

I won't go into too much detail about my situation as there are others involved who deserve the right to privacy and room to grow. My intention today is to share how I feel, how I am processing what I am facing not to make anyone feel bad or not be able to move forward. My focus is to help YOU identify whether or not you are living fear and to be honest with yourself so that you feel empowered to take the necessary action you need to move forward and so you know you are not alone. Fair enough? :)

First, what inspired me to write this post... so this morning I woke up early with a fright, feeling very anxious, scared and... in overwhelming fear, it was nightmare that woke me and I just could not get back to sleep because it felt so real no matter how I tried.

The Nightmare...

I was running and hiding with my son, telling him he will be ok, mummy will look after him. I asked people to hide me while being chased by someone I know. 

In terms of whether or not to take notice of our nightmares, I think this definition helps to answer that question:

A nightmare is a dream occurring during rapid eye movement (REM) sleep that results in feelings of strong terror, fear, distress or extreme anxiety. This phenomenon tends to occur in the latter part of the night and oftentimes awakens the sleeper, who is likely to recall the content of the dream.
— Psychology Today: https://www.psychologytoday.com/conditions/nightmares

My Fear...

At present, I'm dealing with a personal situation, while it is not life threatening, it is something that we need to work through as a family, which is positive. I feel I have avoided, ignored or overlooked the implications of it for far too long (years in fact) if I am being truly honest about it (finally), but whatever the outcome, I will never give up on the happiness of our family and others around us. 

Despite this, I'm feeling optimistic and hopeful for a positive result. I do not like to dwell on negatives, as you may know, so I'm not going to keep going back to this and sharing. Life is full of negatives, but I believe it is how we manage them that helps us get through to see the positives. I'm simply keeping it real but there is a point where we need to maintain some privacy to help those who need it most.

I believe that every day is an opportunity for change for myself and others. I believe we should give people the opportunity to help themselves as well.  

I believe in hope.

I am simply being honest, in part of my life I am feeling fear and I hope this post helps you to be honest with yourself about what worries you. Use your gut feeling. I don't want to feel this fear and I am working on my mindset to feel more empowered and less fearful, but it is a process. Although it is reality, which I won't ignore either because I need to deal with it the best way I can and get the support I need as well and make sure my family all feel supported, safe and loved too.

Saying all this, there's a part of me feeling numb.

There's part of me that feels so strong, empowered, driven, confident and inflexible on some of the issues facing us today. Actually this is a perfect example of how I feel outside of this particular challenge....

Then there's a part of me that feels weakened, angry, let down, untrusting and heart broken.

Signs or Symptoms Of Fear & Anxiety I have identified in me:

  • Nightmares related to my worries or trouble sleeping
  • Visual flashbacks of events that have concerned me
  • Feeling anxious, tense, distant, restless, fatigued, guarded, numb, fearful, untrusting, disassociated. grief & loss
  • Feeling not in control of the emotions, ie spontaneous crying when I think about my worries 
  • Causing me distress and problems in my relationship
  • Connecting past memories with my current worries, reliving the past

When & Where To Seek Help...

First and foremost I am not in fear for my life or anyone else's if you are in fear of your life call the police immediately, in Australia the number to call is 000.

When to seek help... as soon as you can! Waiting will prolong the issues for you and make it more difficult for you to overcome the fears you are carrying around with you. The first step is to acknowledge and be honest with yourself that there is a real concern to be managed. It's not about blame, it's about facts. No one can deny, factual evidence.

I know I need to talk to a professional to help us move forward. Although, part of me doesn't want to. Already having a level of PTSD and anxiety doesn't help matters but I am drawing on my happiness and exciting journey within the professional areas of my life to maintain positive and happy thoughts. I do have hope that things can improve and get back on track and I can trust again, but I also know it's going to be a long journey.

I guess the first step for you and it is the basis of this post is to seek support and help. See your GP or mental health counsellor, speak to a trusted friend, your parents, grandparents, or someone that can guide you to further support. Most importantly know you are not alone.

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With Inspiration & Courage,

Heather


STOP! Before you go, I know you are busy, but check out these when you have a moment: